You’re probably too fancy for this. I bet you only sail on boats that have bicycles on the back attached to giant paddles so you can travel all Willy Wonka style for miles and miles enjoying exhaustion-induced hallucinations that make you think you’re about to get a tattoo from someone using a steak knife.
You’re probably too good for this. I bet you only do things that start off with someone personally delivering you oatmeal salted with baby otter tears and served with a spoon so earth-friendly you can toss it like a milkbone to an orca as it leaps over your kayak-rowboat-with-a-sail-thingy-dinghy.
I bet you wouldn’t be interested in this. I bet you only go to parties where people are half-dressed because they tore their formal wear apart to indicate varying levels of toughness.
But, you know, if you have nothing else going on. If you appreciate the simple perfection that is pancake. If you know that fun has everything to do with pink flamingos and being back in the harbor in time for happy hour. Then, I guess you can come. Please come, actually. And bring the knives. No reason.